I'm Baa-ack

Hello, everyone, did you miss me? I'm sure you have all been waiting with baited breath for my return. I have been busy, let me tell you. On Saturday, December 22nd, we left for our Christmas trip to Council Bluffs, Iowa to see family on my Dad's side. The weather people made us nervous as they doomed on about a major snowstorm to hit the midwest. Mommy and Daddy never believe the weather people, they've been burned one too many times. So, we left at 2 pm. Things were going well. I was busy watching Elmo on my new portable DVD player. Actually, I believe Mommy enjoyed watching Sesame Street more than me. We made it four hours to Des Moines when the storm hit. And boy, what a storm! Cars were everywhere--ditches, spun out on the roads and all were covered with snow. Daddy was glad Enterprise offered a free upgrade to an SUV, we needed the 4x4 action. Anyway, 7 1/2 hours later, we arrived at our lovely motel. I was exhausted, my butt hurt from sitting so long. Daddy unpacked the car and I went with Mommy to the room. Aside from the funky smell, the worn pink chairs and the stained pink carpet, the room was fabulous! I still don't understand why Mommy cleaned EVERYTHING with Clorox wipes and wouldn't let me walk around barefoot. Anyway, they decided I needed sleep and set up my Pack and Play. What the heck is a Pack and Play anyway?

Oh, this stupid thing? I don't think so!

I devised a strategic plan to get myself out...I screamed for 45 minutes straight. Mommy even took me out of the stupid thing and was holding me and I still screamed. I screamed so much Mommy and Daddy let me sleep in their bed and the people next door were nice enough to pound on the wall, trying to get me to stop screaming. Yeah, that was a good strategy by them, pound on the wall making more noise for me to scream over. I finally decided to quiet down and I slept like a dream. Mommy and Daddy did not, however. I don't quite know why.

On the 23rd, we spent the day at Grandma and Grandpa's. The visit didn't start out so well as I decided a tumble down 6 stairs was necessary. Aside from a red mark on my head and Mommy being paranoid about possible altered level of conciousness, I was fine. Auntie Becky gave all us cousins a present to open, an Aquadoodle. I'm sure I will love this.

Christmas eve started with a community bath with my cousin Ellen. We caught up on our lives. Ellen is still very interested in my male part, saying, "what's that?" Once again, I still don't know. Maybe she's sad she doesn't have one.

After our bath, it was time for presents. Yea!

Everyone got some cool presents except for Auntie Brandy who was only given water. She must not be well hydrated.

Auntie Beth got herself for Christmas. I'm glad someone gave the gift of self to her.

Cousin Brayden caught up with Grandpa during present opening time. Grandpa didn't scare me this day, but on the 26th he wore a bright red sweatshirt that reminded me an awful lot of evil Santa. I cried. Mommy and Daddy hope I get over this quickly.

Christmas morning we all opened presents from Santa. I was tired this morning, don't know why since I was able to sleep all four nights with Mommy and Daddy. Mommy sure looks tired too. I heard her mutter something about me being squirrley and crying in my sleep.

Auntie Bonnie, Uncle Todd and cousins Ellen and Ryan cuddled up on the sofa for a Christmas story.

Later the whole family rocked out to Guitar Hero 3. Even Grandma! Doesn't she look fierce? Watch out, Slash, I hear Guns and Roses is looking for a new Guitar Hero!

We left for home on the 26th. The ride home was much less exciting than the ride to Iowa. I am having a hard time adjusting to the lonliness of my crib. There doesn't seem to be enough room for Mommy and Daddy in there. I still can't convince them to let me sleep in their bed. I'll keep trying. I've heard it is much easier to get out of my crib if I learn to climb. . . sounds like a challenge for the new year!

Hope you all had a wonderful holiday and here's to an exciting 2008.

Oooh, the Pretty Colors...

Hola. What? You never seen a kid in the tub before? You got a problem with my hair? Oh, you're wondering about the egg sized lump on my forehead. Sorry, I'm a bit on edge. It's a long story. Sit back, relax, and I'll tell it syllable by syllable.

Wait a minute, I'm fading. . . fading. . . why is everything suddenly black?

Ha ha! Gotcha. So here's the story. I was minding my own business, waiting for my servants (ie: Mommy and Daddy) to finish preparing me for my whirlpool bath. I was carefully mulling over the day's events--running, throwing toys, screaming, babbling, falling down frequently from running too fast--er, I mean, NOT falling down from running too fast. My muscles were tired from working all day. I just needed to relax in my spa. Then, out of no where the bathtub just gets up and hits me in the forehead. Out of nowhere, I tells ya!

Not once, but twice. I look like I have horns. Stinkin' bathtub, what did I ever do to deserve such treatment? Nothing, except the occasional spontaneous waterfall from my nether regions (I really can't control that, people). And I guess I have accidentally pooed in there a couple of times. You got me this time, bathtub. Mama and Dada were really worried about my new egghead. I just wanted to look extra cute for Christmas pictures.

Never fear, we toddlers are quite resilient. I promptly forgot about the new addition to my face. Must mean I'm feeling okay, or I have amnesia. One of the two. Wait a minute, who are you and why am I talking to you?

Lily's 351 Day Old Party

Holy cow, it's party central around here! Cousin Lily had her first birthday party a couple weeks early at Grandma and Grandpa's house. I was nice enough to sit in her chair for a while to warm it up. Such royal treatment. Don't worry, Lily, I didn't leave any of my custom made 'presents' in the chair. . . at least I don't think I did.

Here we are with Lily, the birthday girl.




Before the festivities began, Joe schooled Daddy in dinosaurs.

I then schooled Daddy in dinosaurs. Daddy was sad. Face it, Daddy, us kids are better at dinosaurs.



Daddy wasn't sad for long, though. Cake! Here's Lily's pretty Hello Kitty cake. Hmmm, frosting. I can't wait.

Jakie was so excited about the cake. We sang Happy Birthday and he decided blowing the candle out early would make us all stop singing so he could eat cake earlier. It didn't work.

Yea! We're done singing! Time for cake.

Lily got her own little cake. She wasn't quite sure what to do and was looking to her Mommy for pointers.

Looks like she figured it out.

The aftermath. You aren't going to throw that frosting away, are you? Such a shame.

The party, in full swing. It's getting a little crazy.

Whew, Joe's losing clothes, and he's in a bucket. I didn't know it was going to be that kind of party!

Time for presents. Lily liked the paper better than the presents. I concur, Lily. Paper is very fun to play with.

I thought the present opening was boring. The entire time everyone was ooing and aahing over the gifts, I kept myself busy with this activity table. They don't know what they were missing. Oh well, c'est la vie.

Notice the two extra little kids next to me? Uncle Donnie's friend Jon brought his 18 month old twins to the party, too. So let me count: one 6 year old, two 4 year olds, one 2 year old, two 18 month olds, two 16 month olds and a year old kid. That's a spicy meatball (a rockin' party)!

A Minute in the Life of AJ

Friday, December 7, 2007

9:03 AM



Friday, December 7, 2007

9:04 AM

Anyone want me to come over to your house to demonstrate my destruction skills?

Food Adventures/Road Blocks

Hi. I really don't understand people's obsession with food. If it were up to me, I would just eat Goldfish crackers and corn puffs (off the floor, of course). But, Mommy and Daddy feel this is not appropriate nutrition. So, I decided to try my hand at a new food.

Raw potatoes! One day, Daddy noted I was very quiet and was in the kitchen. Daddy came in the kitchen to find me gnawing on these two raw potatoes. They sure were tasty. Daddy was a little worried about me eating them because he is allergic to raw potatoes. I know, a unique allergy, huh? So sad, too, because he loves potatoes. He has to depend on Mommy to peel and prepare them--Daddy is very independent, and it's very hard for him to depend on someone else to make the potatoes. Wow, that's tough, Daddy.

So anyway, the other day I was voluntarily eating my lunch, when out of nowhere this big, blue, fluffy thing comes up and tickles me. This is what happens when you are tickled by a big, blue, fluffy thing. Hopefully the thing (Mommy) has learned her lesson!

Stranger Danger

Wow, another snowy day. What should we do today, Mommy?

No, I don't think I want to play in the yard today. My face still hurts from last weekend's snowy escapade.

The mall? To see Santa? Are you serious? Uh, that includes bundling up and leaving the house. Plus, isn't Santa on the lamb? He is a felon, with all his breaking and entering, right? I remember all the stuff you say about stranger danger. Why doesn't this apply to Santa?

Yeah, I'm busy. I have a contest going at this time, I'm trying to see if I can fit this whole rattle in my mouth. I might make the Guinness Book of World Records. Oh, alright, Mommy. Quit your whining. We can go to the mall. Maybe it won't be so busy since it's snowing. Be sure to put the chains on the car tires. I'm trying to be positive about my Santa visit. It can't be all that bad. . . I vaguely remember last year.

Holy cow! What was I thinking! Where are the cops? To quote Jakie, "Helk, helk!" This guy is the scariest man I have ever seen! Get me out of here, Mommy! Why are you laughing your head off at me? I am traumatized, this is awful!

Mommy says: Poor AJ. We arrived at the mall only to find Santa on lunch break (supposedly feeding his reindeer) until 2 pm. We had 50 minutes to kill, so I walked around the whole mall with him, and the snow did keep most people away. He ate about 2 cups worth of Cheerios during this time, and he was pretty antsy--he wanted to run. We were the second people in line at 2 pm and we watched as infant twins had their photo taken with Santa. The boy twin started screaming instantly, and the girl twin sat and smiled. Then it was AJ's turn. He sat on Santa's lap and looked at him, looked at the photographer, then looked at me and started wailing. If you know AJ, he really doesn't cry that often unless he is really scared. He was scared silly. Poor guy. It took Mr. Blankie, Cheerios and lots of cuddles to calm him down. I still think it's pretty funny. Hopefully he won't remember this!

A Magical Night

Holy cow, did you see what grew in our living room overnight?

It's a huge spruce tree! Miss Kitty and Cashy must have planted a pinecone overnight. Mommy and Daddy were anxious to see my reaction to this tree. Apparently it is a tradition to have a tree up for Christmas and they are afraid I will try to climb said tree. They haven't put the lights up yet--that usually takes a few days to complete, I am told. They also told me that if I am good (what else am I?), Santa will come down the chimney and bring me presents on Christmas Eve while I am sleeping. I sure hope he knows how to move the couch out of the way of the fireplace. He must be strong. Shouldn't we be scared that a strange, bearded, strong man is breaking and entering into our house? Hmm, guess not.

Yeah, the tree is pretty boring. I like my CD player a lot more. My toys are much better than that prickly old tree. Green? That's so last year.

Miss Kitty loves the tree. Good. Then she'll stay away from my toys. No, Kitty, those are MY toys, Kitty! I'm not really into sharing. I'll make it a New Year's resolution. Maybe. . .

A Winter Wonderland of Fun!

Whew, what a whirlwind weekend. Aunties Beth and Brandy came up to visit me (just me) and were very entranced by the Guitar Hero game, as evidenced by this photo. This all happened, of course, while I was sleeping. I miss out on so much with those darn naps. As much as I try to convince Mommy and Daddy that my whining is actually me giving them compliments on their parenting skills, it doesn't stop the naps. Oh well. I'll keep trying.

This is what happens when I nap. It snowed! About 6 inches, I am told. Mommy and Daddy were so very excited to get me outside. They envisioned me running and playing in the snow, throwing it up and trying to eat it. Yeah, I don't think so. Sitting is so much easier. Plus, did you know snow is extremely cold?

Holy cow, look at all that white stuff. I sure am glad I am safe and sound, sitting here.

Wait, how did this happen? Mommy, why does Daddy have me in the sled-like contraption? We're heading for a sleigh ride? Okay, I'll try it.

I haven't quite figured out how to hang on. I'll just lay here until Daddy comes to get me.

My first sleigh ride.

Face planting in the snow is not suggested. I want to go inside, NOW!